Hizaki's Study

Hizaki sat quietly in his study in the Palace of Versailles, perched neatly upon a wooden chair with an elegant, curved back. It usually sat on the opposite side of Hizaki's desk to the one that he sat on, but this evening it had been moved to the other side of the room, where Hizaki now sat behind an easel in an area of the room left clear for just such occasions.

He raised his paintbrush daintily, adding another streak of blue to the portrait in front of him. As he painted, he mused upon the vision that had come to him the previous day. It was difficult to ignore it, and despite his outwardly calm demeanour, Hizaki felt anxiety stirring. Something is coming... something big...

He set his head on one side, assessing the painting critically, and then dipped his paintbrush in the murky water in a rose-adorned jar on a small table to his side, washing it and carefully dabbing it mostly dry, before mixing a small portion of white and black together and adding highlights to the hair.

It was a portrait of Teruvel Aep Shidal, who, up until yesterday, had been the husband-to-be of Princess Kaya of Clow.

For the past few days Teru's life has turned upside down. One moment he was getting ready for Clow, since he was supposed to marry Princess Kaya and then.. and then not. One moment the boy's thoughts where clear, and now all has turned into a big mess. He knew almost nothing and understood even less.
Now, the only person who could help him sort his thoughts was Hizaki. It always seemed that when Teruvel was having trouble or just being depressed, the Leader would always help. Hime was certanly more patient and caring than Kamijo. It was almost as if the boy could truly trust him... As if...
And perhaps it was not wise to bother the Leagues Princess shortly before dinner time, but it was too late, as Teru approached the study door and knocked. To be frank, he did have a rather bad day which was rather obvious at first sight. After all he was fairly tipsy and you could hardly count shorts and a loose white jumper as something appropriate to wear when meeting with the likes of Hizaki. But was it mentioned before that it is too late now?..

A quiet knock at his door roused Hizaki from his thoughts. He glanced at the clock, noting that it was nearly time for dinner, and then shrugged. Must be important, to bother me this late," he thought, as he silently washed his brush free of paint and dried it, before setting it aside as he called out towards the door.
"Come in."
The door swung open, revealing Teru. Hizaki was a little surprised to see him, but took a moment to carefully look the young man up and down, noting his strange attire - shorts and a loose jumper, which looked rather fetching on him (almost provocative, in fact, but Hizaki pushed that thought to the back of his mind) - and the fact that his eyes seemed a little unfocused. Probably the result of alcohol, Hizaki mused, but I'm sure I'll find that out for certain when he comes closer. After all, the smell is rather strong, particularly with the red wines we usually drink...
Well, if the boy had been drinking and had come here, there was probably something wrong, in any case. Smiling gently, Hizaki rose. "Ah, Teruvel. I'm surprised to see you this late. Would you care for a seat?" He indicated the chair he had just risen from, before laying a delicate hand on the back of it, indicating that he could move it back to it's appointed place in front of the desk. "Is there a problem you wanted me to help you with?" he added, before Teru could reply.

Suddenly, Teru had lost his last grains of confidence and he barely had any to begin with. The whole thing now seemed like a bad idea an perhaps, it would have been best if he had simply turned around and went back to his room without saying anything at all. Instead, the blondie took the offered seat and allowed his gaze to wander over the room.
- Well, um.. I'm not even sure any more. I mean.. We had all the plans and you knew about it. But than everything changed. I know it's all orders and I cannot do anything about it.. and it's not like I want to disobey, just.. - the boy had a very hard time with words. Pausing every other second he looked sadly at Hizaki.
- It's just that I will be lonely now. Me and Princess Kaya used to exchange letters and now....What happened with the wedding plans and all that anyway? - with those words Teru looked up straight at the Princess, almost pinning him down with his innocent gaze, not allowing him to escape the conversation or lie about the answers. It was rather bold of him really, but the elf was hardly thinking straight. A glass of whisky was normally enough to cloud his mind, never mind two...
Then Teru smiled for a moment and almost seemed to give up. He shrugged as if trying to shake off some great of his shoulders, but instead the jumper slid off reaviling more of the milky skin. Teruvel did not notice it at all.
- You know.. you are lucky. You married someone you loved in the end. But Kaya and Yuki.. surely such a union will end in disaster?

As Teru passed close to Hizaki on his way to the chair, Hizaki caught a faint whiff of alcohol, cementing his guess from before - the boy had indeed been drinking. Not wine, though, he thought. Some kind of spirit. Whiskey, perhaps? After all, Teru was known to occasionally indulge in a glass of whiskey...

Drunk or not, however, it was clear that Teru was uncertain, lost, even. As he turned to settle in his own chair - comfortable leather affair, in a rich, warm brown - Hizaki made a decision. Throwing etiquette to the side for the moment, he reclined in the armchair in the same lazily elegant manner as his husband (whom he had picked the mannerism up from), steepling his fingers thoughtfully in front of his face. It was a clear sign that the Princess had decided to speak informally.

Teru's words were saddening. Hizaki had known from the start that the last-minute change of plans would be an upheaval for the young man, but he had hoped that Teru would be able to deal with it better than he seemed to be.
He sighed.
"I'm sorry," he said, finally. "I knew that changing things, especially so late, would be difficult for everyone, and particularly painful for you, but..."
He hesitated. The truth was, it wasn't just the vision that had made him reluctant to allow Teru to go to Clow. He hadn't particularly wanted to boy to leave from the beginning, but it had been decided and there had been no way to stop it. His recent vision had been the perfect excuse to change things, but even so...
"I just couldn't shake the feeling that something was going to go terribly wrong," he said finally. "Something didn't feel right even from the beginning. The vision I had a few days ago only served to cement that. I..."
He trailed off as Teru made a movement with his shoulders, knocking his jumper off of one shoulder and revealing the milky-white skin beneath. With difficulty, Hizaki resisted the urge to bite his lip at the sight, and continued, forcing his gaze back onto Teru's eyes.
"I don't know if I have changed anything, or made anything better by sending Yuki in your place. And yet... I have the strangest feeling that everything will be alright between them in the end. I met Princess Kaya briefly many years ago, and I do not think that he and Yuki are as incompatible as you may believe."

He leaned forwards, resting his elbows on the desk and his chin upon his hands, his eyes searching Teru's face for a sign of response, before moving to examine the rest of the young man. It was strange to see him in such casual clothing. If he hadn't been obviously drunk, Hizaki would almost have wondered if the choice had been deliberate, an attempt to provoke him.
He cast about for something else to focus on, and remembered the crystal decanter and set of wine glasses on the chest behind his desk. "Would you like a glass of wine?" he offered.

When Hizaki finished talking, the boy felt almost guilty for ever coming to him in the first place. After all Hime probably had much to deal with because of the changes and he was only trying to do what was best for everyone, even if it did not seem that way at first.
With Kamijo currently away on some trade mission it was probably hard for Hizaki to manage things anyway, and now Teru was bothering him as well. Shuddering slightly, the elf looked at Hizaki with slight worry. Mixing drinks never ended well with his tolerance to alcohol, but the boy nodded anyway. Perhaps clouding his mind further might force out all of the confusing and sad thoughts, at least for the time being. And perhaps afterwards everything would be somehow ok, somehow things would fix themselves. It was all wishful thinking of course. Alcohol never truly solved anything at all. It only gave an excuse to do certain things, which where normally considered forbidden, or simply inappropriate at the time.
- I'm sorry as well. None of this is your fault and you are only trying to do your best. No one can really expect any more of you, and despite it you probably know that we all have moments when we wish to wave a magic wand and solve everything. But that only happens in fairytales. By now I should really have learned that life is not like that. But I still don't want to believe the truth. Hime-san, does that make me a fool? - yet again Teru allowed his gaze to wander round the room and then back at the Princess. He was not really expecting an answer from him. Of course he was a fool for believing in fairy tales. Besides, the question was mainly rhetorical anyway.

Hizaki was slightly surprised by Teru's acquiescence. Whiskey (if his suspicions were correct) and wine didn't mix well, and the boy's tolerance was low at the best of times. Really, he wasn't sure why he had offered in the first place. Perhaps his mind was not quite working properly. After all, he had been working extra hard recently, with his husband away, especially with the sudden change of plans, and he was tired. It perhaps wasn't the best of ideas.
Still... one glass couldn't hurt.

With that in mind, he turned and poured out two glasses of rich, fruity red wine (in truth, he preferred white, but red was somehow more alike to the image that they were trying to uphold). The glasses themselves were nearly works of art, beautiful crystal creations, simple and yet elegant, each adorned with a delicate glass rose. As he poured the drinks, Teru spoke again, ending with a question.
"Hime-san, does that make me a fool?"

Hizaki passed one glass to the young man on the other side of his desk, and took a sip of his own, resisting the urge to rub the bridge of his nose out of tiredness. He saw Teru's eyes wander over the room, then back to him, and met them.
"If not wanting to believe the truth makes you a fool, then we are all fools," he said after a moment. He stared unseeingly over Teru's shoulder, one hand absent-mindedly playing over the top of his wine glass, making it sing. "There isn't a single person who can truthfully say that there were never any times when he didn't want to accept the truth. No, not even me, or Kamijo for that matter. He sighed, letting his eyes fall on Teru again, taking in the boy's appearance, the play of the firelight on his silver-grey hair, the spots where it tickled his creamy skin...
"Even now..." he said quietly, almost to himself, "even now, there are things that I don't want to accept...".